5 Signs Your Friend Might Be Struggling (And How to Help)

Sometimes the people who seem the strongest are fighting the hardest battles in silence.

Mental health struggles don't always come with obvious warning signs. Your friend might be laughing at your jokes, showing up to work every day, and posting happy photos on social media—all while battling depression, anxiety, or other mental health challenges behind closed doors.

At Awareness Attire, we believe that recognizing these subtle signs and knowing how to respond can literally save lives. Here are five key indicators that your friend might be struggling, along with practical ways you can offer support.

1. They've Become Masters of Cancellation

The Sign: Your usually reliable friend starts canceling plans frequently, often at the last minute. They might use phrases like "I'm just tired" or "something came up" repeatedly.

What's Really Happening: Mental health struggles can make even simple social activities feel overwhelming. Depression can drain energy for basic tasks, while anxiety can make social situations feel impossible to navigate.

How to Help:

• Don't take cancellations personally

• Offer low-pressure alternatives: "Want to just sit and watch a movie instead?"

• Let them know you're available without setting expectations: "No pressure, but I'm here if you want company"

• Continue inviting them—isolation often makes things worse

2. Their Communication Style Has Shifted

The Sign: Text responses become shorter, less frequent, or oddly formal. Phone calls might be avoided entirely. They might seem "off" in conversations—distracted, distant, or unusually quiet.

What's Really Happening: Mental health challenges can make it difficult to maintain normal communication patterns. Depression can make everything feel like too much effort, while anxiety can create fear around saying the "wrong" thing.

How to Help:

• Match their communication style—if they're texting short responses, don't overwhelm them with paragraphs

• Send low-pressure check-ins: "Thinking of you today" with no expectation of a response

• Share something that made you think of them—a funny meme, a song, or a memory

• Be patient with delayed responses

3. They're Either Sleeping Too Much or Too Little

The Sign: They mention being exhausted all the time despite sleeping a lot, or conversely, they're posting on social media at 3 AM regularly. Their sleep schedule seems completely disrupted.

What's Really Happening: Sleep disturbances are one of the most common symptoms of mental health struggles. Depression often causes hypersomnia (sleeping too much) or insomnia, while anxiety can make it nearly impossible to quiet racing thoughts at bedtime.

How to Help:

• Avoid judgment about their sleep patterns

• Suggest gentle, sleep-friendly activities if they're up late: "Can't sleep either? Want to chat?"

• Share resources about sleep hygiene if they seem open to it

• Offer to be an accountability buddy for healthy routines if they express interest

4. Their Usual Interests Have Lost Their Spark

The Sign: The friend who used to love hiking hasn't mentioned trails in months. The artist in your group hasn't shared their work lately. They seem disconnected from hobbies and activities they once enjoyed.

What's Really Happening: Anhedonia—the inability to feel pleasure in activities that were once enjoyable—is a hallmark symptom of depression. It's not that they're choosing to be uninterested; their brain chemistry is literally making it difficult to experience joy.

How to Help:

• Don't push them to "just do the things they love"—it's not that simple

• Offer to do activities together with no pressure for them to enjoy it

• Celebrate small wins: "I'm proud of you for coming to coffee today"

• Suggest new, low-pressure activities that might spark interest

5. They're Giving Away Possessions or Talking About the Future Differently

The Sign: They're suddenly decluttering extensively, giving away meaningful items, or making comments about not being around or not mattering. Any mention of feeling like a burden should be taken seriously.

What's Really Happening: This can be a sign of suicidal ideation. When someone is planning to end their life, they often begin "putting their affairs in order."

How to Help:

• Take this seriously—don't assume they're just being dramatic

• Ask directly: "Are you thinking about hurting yourself?"

• Don't promise to keep suicidal thoughts secret

• Help them connect with professional resources immediately

• Stay with them or ensure they're not alone

• Call 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) together if needed

The Most Important Thing: Just Show Up

Here's what we've learned from our community at Awareness Attire: The most powerful thing you can do is simply show up consistently. You don't need to have all the answers or fix everything. Sometimes the most healing thing you can offer is your presence and the message that they matter.

Quick Do's and Don'ts:

DO:

• Listen without trying to solve everything

• Use phrases like "I'm here for you" and "You matter to me"

• Continue being their friend, not their therapist

• Encourage professional help when appropriate

• Take care of your own mental health too

DON'T:

• Say "just think positive" or "others have it worse"

• Make it about you ("I know exactly how you feel")

• Give ultimatums about getting help

• Assume they'll ask for help when they need it

• Ignore warning signs hoping they'll go away

You're Not Alone in This

Supporting a friend through mental health struggles can feel overwhelming, but remember—you don't have to do it alone. Professional resources, support groups, and mental health organizations exist to help both your friend and you navigate this journey.

At Awareness Attire, we believe that every conversation about mental health helps break down stigma and build understanding. Sometimes, wearing a simple message like "You Are Not Alone" or "Mental Health Matters" can be the conversation starter that lets someone know it's safe to open up.

Your friend is lucky to have someone who cares enough to notice these signs. Trust your instincts, lead with love, and remember that small acts of kindness can have profound impacts on someone's mental health journey.

If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts, please reach out for help immediately. Contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988, or visit your local emergency room.

At Awareness Attire, we're committed to fostering conversations that matter. Our apparel serves as gentle reminders that mental health struggles are valid, help is available, and hope is always possible. Explore our collection of conversation-starting designs at awarenessattire.net.

What signs have you noticed in your own circle? How do you show up for friends who might be struggling? Share your thoughts in the comments below—your experience might be exactly what someone else needs to hear today.